Apparently, there’s a vicious rumour going around that this thing called ‘football’ where you kick a ball with your foot starts today … it’s where fit good-looking rich hot and sweaty men chase each other around a field, whilst grabbing and tackling then whipping their shirts up or off and hugging/kissing if they score whilst thousands of other men cheer them on, ending in a communal bath and/or shower. And the reason I don’t like, watch or take part is?

“Come on The Reds”

“Up The Toffees”